Sometimes, it is more comfortable to rely on rules to structure our ways of loving. You tell your children a list of commandments, do’s and don’ts, what to get and how to pay, (and the list goes on) with the hope that the household is managed effectively. In religious life, we commit to de more, job descriptions, timetables, and clear goal-setting to determine how we should treat each other and live out our vows. Don’t get me wrong, rules and guidelines are important. They save us time, trouble, and resources. They help us achieve our goals of the day, evaluate people according to objective standards, and determine the scope of our responsibilities. I mean, it is an efficient and disciplined form of loving. We love by playing by the rules.

But, we are also familiar with another kind of love. One that reaches out through spontaneous and simple gestures – pats on the back that cheer us up, sincere how are yous, a concerned look that tells us that we exist and are valued. It can happen at different parts of the day, often unnoticed and from unlikely people. And the care that comes with it surprises us and restores our faith in humanity. Such is the power of random acts of kindness. Random because it comes out of nowhere. Its lightning speed reveals the beat of a heart that cares. Random but not arbitrary. In love, there is always the beloved, the chosen target. More than playing by the rules, we long for love as deep, concrete, and lasting connection.

No other experience expresses this yearning more than the human touch. When we extend our hand to lift our fallen friend, that gesture reaches the different dimensions of human existence: from the physical, which makes our intentions real; to the spiritual, which tells that person he/she/they are loved concretely. When we forgive someone, her value and existence are affirmed in the here and now. When we cheer our friends, children, or loved ones, it stirs good feelings in them, making them believe once again in the kindness of humanity. But, let me get one thing out of the way. Not all touches are good. We know that there have been abuses—careless violations, sexual malice, and violent expressions of touch. We have grown sensitive about safeguarding. I am not glorifying touch here. But these cases should not distract our attention from and diminish the value of touch. There is something therapeutic about it. We are comforted in some way when we hug those who have lost loved ones. When we lay our hands on the sick and pray for their healing, it nurses hope in us. Through touch, we get to feel how deep, concrete, and lasting a moment of connection is.

It is no wonder then that the mysteries we hold dear in our faith, like the Incarnation (God becoming man), are best pondered and kept in the experiences of touch. Salvation, sin, creation, forgiveness, justice, you name it. In the Gospel scenes, God allowed Himself to be touched. Think about that. The divine mystery that is beyond human understanding and experience became like us and lets himself be touched. In doing so, the connection amplifies what He already holds dear in his heart—our anguish, insecurities, and longings. When Jesus asked, “Who touched me?”, he sought the face of the suffering woman to relieve her of her prolonged pain and beyond that, told her that her faith saved her. When Jesus took the hand of a dead girl and said “Talitha Koum!”, it was divine power that breathed in new possibilities and beyond that, nourished her into being. In today’s Gospel, Jesus feeds us with bread and fish to satisfy our wants, so we can hunger for the Living Bread. When we try to touch God, like the hijos of the Nazareno, buyadores of Penafrancia, and the children of the Sto. Nino, we make real our need for Him. A deep, concrete, and lasting connection which, in touching the divine, makes us truly human. And reminds us to whom we belong.

May I invite you to be unafraid to touch the lives of others while letting others touch yours too. If today we see a lack of human compassion, then perhaps we could look into the growing deficit in our touch experiences. It has been limited to the square corners of a screen, the frames of artificial images and videos, and TikTok chunks of thoughts and stories. They only stimulate emotional consumption rather than nurture our desire for human connection. Sadly, we are far removed from each other, the world around us, and God. Although rules and structures can keep us safe and make daily living efficient, they remain incomplete. They only usher us in a position to make deep, concrete, and lasting connections. It is up to us to reach out to one another in love. Can we allow God again to move our hearts so we can extend our hands in random acts of kindness to anyone we meet? Feed the hungry. Clothe the naked. Give a drink to the thirsty. Visit those who are in prison. Lay our hands on the sick and the depressed—the beatitudes, which are none other than God’s saving love made real in human touch.

*Delivered during the formands recollection and at mass for parents of the Ateneo de Manila Senior High School