Matthew 18:21-35; 24th Sunday in Ordinary Time

Our readings today invite us to reflect on two hot-button themes in Christian spirituality: anger and forgiveness. Perhaps someone we know has anger management issues. Maybe we are bearing the burden of deep-seated, long-standing anger. Certainly, this is something I hear quite often when in confessions. Anger can be unpleasant, and fearsome; and many people feel guilty for feeling it, seeing it as an emotion that no proper Catholic is supposed to feel.

Anger in itself is not a sin. Like all other human emotions, anger is a natural, valid reaction to certain circumstances. Anger arises when we are wronged, when we experience injustice, when we are blocked from our goals or aspirations. It can be a useful emotion when the situation calls for us to defend ourselves or to right a particular wrong. When channeled effectively, the energy that arises from anger can achieve good. However, there are times when anger is unregulated, disproportionate, spreading like wildfire, destroying everything in its wake. It is interesting how the passage from the Book of Sirach talks about anger – “wrath and anger are hateful things, yet the sinner hugs them tight…Could anyone nourish anger against another and expect healing from the Lord?” It sounds likes it is not so much anger that is the problem. It is when we hug it, nourish it. In other words, it is our attachment to anger that gets us into trouble.

There is a Harvard brain scientist, Jill Bolte Taylor, who found out how long an emotion lasts in the body. According to her, an emotion lasts 90 seconds. Perhaps we wonder: then how come I have been angry with my spouse for over 20 years? While emotions last only seconds in our bodies, we can prolong an emotion by repeating the narrative over and over in our heads. This is how we get attached to our anger. Being angry can feel good. When we are angry, we can feel that the world owes us. We may feel so justified in our anger, stewing and imagining ways of getting back at the person who caused us pain. How often do we hold on to our anger like a prized possession? We convince ourselves that our anger is justified, that it is a source of strength. But Sirach warns us that it is, in fact, a poison that slowly eats away at our souls. When we cling to anger, we allow it to control us, clouding our judgment and leading us further away from the path of the good.

Our Gospel today presents us with the parable of the unforgiving servant. We can take this as a cautionary tale about what happens when a person is so blinded by anger that he cannot recognize the presence of mercy and compassion in his life. The servant was already forgiven by his master, and yet, he still demanded payment from the other servant who owed him much less. Dear friends, our Gospel reminds us that forgiveness is the antidote to our toxic attachment to anger. Perhaps we may resist this, thinking that forgiveness means condoning the wrong or letting go of justice. This is not so. Forgiveness does not mean that we brush things under the rug. Rather, forgiveness means freeing ourselves from the burden of anger and resentment, entrusting justice to God. Forgiveness is our intentional choice to refuse to be poisoned by anger. Forgiveness is an act of liberation, both for the one forgiven and the one forgiving. And when freed from anger, we can move towards genuine repair and healing.

Ultimately, we need to remember that we can only truly forgive when we ground ourselves in the experience of being forgiven by God. Any act of forgiveness is an acknowledgement and an extension of God’s forgiveness of us. Perhaps one grace that we can ask for is to be once again be grounded in the mercy and forgiveness of God, knowing that we have no claim to it, and yet God freely and continuously gives it to us. May we be granted the grace to let go of our anger and resentment, to open our hearts to God’s infinite mercy and to extend that mercy to those who have wronged us. In so doing, we not only mend broken relationships but also find healing and peace for our own souls.